I feel the need to control everything all of the time. I wonder why I am stressed and anxious all of the time. So much so that I have gone to the doctor 2 times (in the last 2 years) thinking I was having a heart attack just to be told that nothing (other than weight) was wrong with me.
As I begin to realize that it is my need to be in control, I have been trying to see how much better life is when I trust the people around me and spirit of God. I am still on the journey with God…that will take some time, but I am learning and understanding. But I am starting to let go of the need to be in control. It is amazing what we can accomplish when it is a we, and not just a me telling ‘you.’
My personal and work family do amazing things, and I am feeling much better about things because of the trust of those around me…don’t get me wrong, I am still a control freak, but I am trying to let as much go as I can now…and more later, and more later.
I am a work in progress, and it is sad that it took trips to the doctor, and a personal story about fear of flying to make me see a simple truth (I’m not even close). Trust is 100% or 0%.
Love – Me